aniketsdiaries's blog

Dear God

Dear God,

I am just another human creature that you have developed (and I guess, forgot about him). Anyways, i just thought to write to you.

I am totally clueless about your plans about me. What is happening is at one point i am on the top of the world and the next time you just throw me from the pick.Almost like a bungy jump, i have so many ups and downs. I really have no time to settle. Every time i have a reason to cheer about, immediately i get something sad, disappointing happening. Why is so god? WHY IS SO?

I understand this is what life is about! But when i see around it is not always the thing. Agreed there are people who are living their life miserably. I have much better life to live, and i am thankful to you. But i am really frustrated with the frequent ups-and downs. If i have something to celebrate, now a days i am sure that something bad, something sad is surely on the way and this is what scares me.

I am really disappointed, low on moral don't know what to do. I have never felt so helpless, tired about my life.

I don't understand, the problems are really big, or just the way i am seeing them is wrong? Is it a Anxiety or Panic attack that i am going through? Look at me god, LOOK AT ME! Am i the same person, i was few years back? When i see my photos of past, i feel so bad and pity about those photos. How happy i was that time?

For the world, i am a happy-go-lucky creature. I pretend, i swear god i pretend to be. But in deep inside my soul, i am shattered, completely shattered.

I am bored of this civilized life, i am bored of the peoples, their so called egos around me, their mentality really sucks. I hate it. I want to break free, go out somewhere where nobody will know me. Where i will be JUST ME.

Help me god, help me. Give me strength to live the way i have dreamed about My life. Please give me some admin rights to handle it. I don't want some super user to control it :-(

सारी उमर हम, मर मर के जी लिये, एक पल तो अब हमे जिने दो.. जिने दो..

बचपन तो गया, जवानी भी गयी, एक पल तो अब हमे जिने दो.. जिने दो..

Give me some sunshine
Give me some rain
Give me another chance
I wanna grow up once again

गेला अनिकेत कुणीकडे?

गेले ४-५ दिवसं कधी आले आणि कधी गेले कळालेच नाही. रविवार दिनांक १७ जानेवारी रोजी पु.ल.देशपांडे उद्यानात मराठी ब्लॉगर्सचा एक स्नेहमेळावा भरवला होता. आधीचे काही दिवस त्याच्या तयारीत गेले आणि नंतरचे दोन दिवस अपडेट्स, नविन लिड्स (!) वर गेले.

मेळाव्याला अपेक्षेपेक्षा अधीक उत्कृष्ठ प्रतिसाद मिळाला. ६० लोकं आली होती. असो, त्याबद्दल सर्वकाही ब्लॉगवर लिहिले आहेच. नंतर फोरम तयार करणे, गुगल ग्रुप तयार करणे, अखिल भारतीय मराठी साहीत्य संमेलनासंबंधी अनेक गोष्टी करावयाला मिळाल्या संध्याकाळचे तेच चालु आहे. ब्लॉग्स तयार केले, पोस्ट्स टाकणे चालु आहे. लवकरात लवकर हे सर्व काही इतरांसाठी खुले करायचे असल्याने जोरदार कामं चालु आहेत.

ह्या स्नेहमेळाव्याच्या अनुषंगाने एक बातमी म्हणुन पेपरमध्ये दोन-तिनदा नाव झळकले. फार पुर्वीपासुन एक इच्छा होती ति सुध्दा पुर्ण झाली. आता, सध्याचे तरी अंतिम ध्येय म्हणजे स्वतःचे एक पुस्तक छापणे. लवकरात लवकर मला ती गोष्ट घडावी अशी आशा आहे.

कार्यालयात कामाचा वेग यथातथाच आहे. २५ तारखेला नविन प्रोजेक्ट आणि टिम किक-ऑफ होते आहे, त्यानंतर जो धिंगाणा चालु होईल त्याबद्दल सध्यातरी मी विचार करण्याचे टाळतोच आहे.

रविवारी सकाळी खानापुरला सायकलवरुन जाउन आलो साधारणपणे ६०+ कि.मी झाले. राहुल नसल्याने बोअर झाले. तो असला की शंभर ठिकाणी थांबत फोटो काढत आरामात जातो आम्ही. ट्रेक/मेरीडा आणि माझ्या सायकल मधला फरक पुन्हा एकदा स्पष्ट झाला. लोक इतकी आरामात असुनही झप झप पुढे निघुन जात होती. असो. शेवटचा २ कि.मी भयानक होते, सेमी-सिंहगडच होता तो चढ, फुल्ल वाट लागली. येताना १.३० तास सतत सायकल चालवत आलो, आज्जीबात थांबलो नाही. फारच दमछाक झाली, कधी एकदा घरी पोहोचतो असे झाले होते. पण एकुण मज्जा आली.

तर असं चाललं आहे बघा गेले काही दिवस!! सांगीतलं आता, विचारु नका गेले काही दिवस आहेस कुठे?

Dholaki & Saxophone

If i have to name two musical instruments that i am crazy about, without hesitation i would say "Dholaki" & "Saxophone". Yeh yeh, completely opposite sections. Dholaki, no matter how dull, depressed you are feeling, just listen to Dholaki for couple of minutes, you will be up and dancing by the time the song is over. It is a amazing instrument. For instance, i am adding two videos i found on youtube. First two are solo performances, whereas the later is a song, but first two minutes of it is just a dholaki. Listen to it, believe me, you won't be disappointed.

And this one, equally good, just watch it till the end...

And the typical lavani song, but the initial few minutes are all dholaki..

About Saxophone, there are couple of good people, but who could be better than "Kenny G". What a romance filled in the music when he plays it. You just feel relaxed and calm, romantic. Every sense of your body feels the romance. Lovely music. There are tones of videos of Youtube, if you haven't heard him before.�

Online submission of investments

... since the day the payroll is outsourced to this company every time i had some or the other problems with them. Such a useless jerks. I really hate them. Investment details, we have to enter on their pathetic website, actual investment details, we have to submit, we have to get the investment xeroxed, we have to fill their pathetic forms of submissions of investment proof. Their website is perfect example of a pathetic UI. Payslips / Tax report are never available when the salary gets credited to your account. Some or the other time, their website is always in trouble. They don't help you or fill your I.T. returns, even if you are ready to pay extra money.

I don't understand if we have to do everything then what they are for? Salary calculations and tax computing is anyways done by the computers. And why my company is still paying them when everybody some-or-the other time cribs about them. May be because our staff don't want to do a thing in that. They are happy with the things going on without their interventions. It was really a good service by the finance manager we had couple of years back. He used to help us, and guide us a lot and he used to do lots of things for us.

Typical government services going on here in I.T. industry isn't it?

First drawing by Ojas

For some, this picture means nothing, but for us, this is a lot, priceless! Because Ojas is the one who draw it. For us this is the first picture which looks like a picture and we are so happy to see it.

FirstPic

Hatred

What happens when you start hating anyone? Especially when in the recent past you have admired that person, the qualities the person belongs. Something happens, and all of a sudden your view changes. All of a sudden, you start noticing the not-so-good qualities, or rather you see through ONLY bad qualities.

Exactly same thing is happening with me. More i talk to that person, more i am not liking him. The most disliking thing of that person is selfishness. It is not that nobody is selfish or i am not selfish. Agree everybody, most of the times, are. But this person, over a period of time gained so much of this quality that prompts me to hate him more, literally in my nerves now.

What can i do? Nothing!!

Darker side of me

Copy of Picture 957

It goes without a say that Every human being have his / hers darker side. In this photo, this dog is no exception to it :-)

BTW did you noticed the health-freak dog? Look at the 6/8 packs!!!

QotD: Introvert or Extrovert?

Are you an introvert or an extrovert? What qualities about that personality trait do you like? Anything you wish you could change?

I'm more of a introvert (म्हणजे आतल्या गाठीचा नाही बरं का),  I prefer "mind talks", than speaking it up loud. You have no idea how much and how many times i keep talking to myself. There is a constant chat happening, even when i am speaking to someone. There is every possibility that, i might be discussing something else inside, totally different than the discussion happening outside.

I am extrovert mostly when i am in a company of people who i know very well. At times i am unstoppable in such company

Mean

Thinking loud, How can i be so mean to someone who was and is always been nice to me. Thats not fair on my part. And i am doing this for whom? for someone about whom silently i always have cribbed?? Why can't we control our mind and tongue? Why there is always a term called repent or regret?

What do i do now? There is no such thing called 'Undo' in real life :-( but atleast i should take care henceforth. I can't go and say sorry, because, then that means to say WHAT I DID. Really shame on me. I am such a bad a**. Atleast i am happy that there are still some secrets buried deep inside me and i haven't disclosed them and never will. I can't be so.. so..umm.. so.. something to break somebody's trust.

Anyways, it is never to late. A small pinch and i am awake now. Thank you my brain, my senses, my mind for waking me up and showing me where i am going and what i was doing. I promise, i will take care.

Things to do in 2010

- Health is wealth. I have to improvise on the wealth that i am loosing. Need to gain control on it

- I need to raise my self-respect. I think at times i am too humble or fell down at the feet of the people. Could it be attitude that i need to bring in my life?

- Parenting.. 2nd time!!?

- Couple of long and quality stories on Marathi blog

- Learn something new. I don't know what it is or what it will be. But i've to do some learning for something new, exciting

- Socialize more (?) with relatives. I am too ignorant with relatives. Mostly avoid visiting them, need to improvise on it

- Be patient with Ojas

- Get some amazing photos (of what?)

- In 2009, i was almost like a Zombie. I don't want to do that in 2010

Will keep updating this list as and when possible.